3 years ago today,my life,my sons life,my families life was changed forever.. our little Natalie went to be with Jesus after suffering her entire life.... I begged the Lord to let her stay,He chose to take her, I came to terms with that soon after. Comfort came in knowing she would no longer be hurting and suffering so..she is dancing the streets of gold along with my daddy..... I take comfort in that daily.I miss her perky little self, her deep dark hair and eyes,wonder what she would be like now. I know she would be running around with her daddy if she could and he would be her protector,dad,friend and would love her more than he did while she was with us....My heart aches, my soul moans at what her passing has done to all of us, I praise God for the many blessings He has given us since that day, the strength ,the courage,the peace,the comfort and the ability to keep on going day after day when our hearts hurt, to let Natalie go and pick up the fight for my son... the struggle is unbearable at times, realizing how unjust it is to have lost both Natalie and my son on that day......
I give thanks that we still have Jason here with us... but ache to hold him,hug him,let him say goodbye to his little girl ,the right way, he tried so hard to save her that night and then was snatched away from her before being able to hold her one last time,to kiss her fat little cheeks again. He was thrown into a hell I cannot begin to understand, I try to think of how he must feel.....but then I cry and hurt to bad, so I pray, I call out to God for relief, and He gives me peace and help. We have had a long fight since then,to bring Jason justice, and the fight isnt over . and will never be over as long as his family is living on this earth......
I know God knows the plan for Jason and it may never be what we want or think is best..HE knows best we must trust HIM alone. I wanted to take this moment to remember Natalie,her cute little cheeks,her dark hair and eyes.....her smile..and think of her up in Heaven , living a perfect life with our Saviour...and give thanks for that knowing and comfort....... I love you Natalie,we all miss you so...... see you in Heaven little angel